I’ve been really tired lately and I find that I tend to be much more self-critical when I’m tired. Yesterday, for example, I was anxious about getting out of the house on time, my baby wasn’t going down for her nap, and I started to blame myself for her delayed nap–I assumed that my anxiety must be transferring to her and preventing her from relaxing. It wasn’t until later in the day that I recalled another equally viable, and in fact more likely, explanation, which was that she always experiences a sleep disruption before she takes a big developmental step (like standing for the first time, or making new vocalizations). In other words, I don’t think her late nap was my fault at all, even though I’d made myself feel bad about it. So later in the day, as I was driving away, I thought to myself: there’s always a more gentle, more loving way to be toward myself. In fact, being self-critical (as I learn again and again), does absolutely nothing for me, or for anyone else, so there isn’t even a good argument against being loving with myself. What about being 100% loving toward myself?
So I’m creating a new self-talk radio station: “All love, all love the time”. It’s like a spa for the soul, with the most comfy, perfectly textured fresh warm bathrobes, cucumber-infused water and orange-infused water, and perfect biscotti in glass bowls–maybe a couple of varieties. And chocolates and crisp green apples. And a little area to watch TV and listen to music. To lounge…and lounge some more… Luxuriate…
